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"Zerstoren" - By Mike Bullen

Added : 22nd April 2009

The following store is a runner-up in the 2009 Blue Dwarf Novella competition. It is set at the time it was written, apart from Commander Phil Febuggure died whilst it was being written. Inconsiderate bastard.

 

Blue Dwarf: Zerstoren

By Mike Bullen

"My name is James Torsky. I'm twenty eight years old and have been serving on Blue Dwarf for just about eight years. Now I'm one of the highest paid members of the crew, responsible for the lives of all of those below me, and most of those above me.  People call me Shrub, I only recently found out why.  I used to be a simple Security Officer on board Blue Dwarf, until something totally unexpected happened and I was thrown into a world way out of my depths.  This is the story about how I became the person I am today.  Play footage."

"Torsky! Torsky, you with us?" Lt Cliggs was standing in the doorway of the small security office on Q deck watching James Torsky throw pencils at a picture of the Captain, Jay Chrysler.  He got him right in the middle of the forhead.
"Bullseye!" Torsky turned to face Drake Cliggs with a big grin on his face.  "Yeah, I'm still here.  Just about anyway.  This job is so boring sometimes, I just wish there was some action around here every now and then."
"Well, I've just received word from Chrysler himself. He has a special job for you."
"Oh?" Torsky seemed to get a bit more interested.
"That's right.  He wants you to do the same check you did yesterday at this time.  And the day before that at this time.  And the day before that too!" Cliggs looks pleased to be torturing Torsky like this.
"Great." Torsky checked his watch. "Eleven twenty three.  It's two minutes early, but oh well.  What must be done!" He gave a sarcastic salute to the lieutenant as he backed out of the door.  Vanessa Chrysler, the captains sister and ships residential nurse, was almost knocked off her feet as Torsky bumped into her.
"Careful!  That's how accidents happen!"
"Sorry, Miss Chrysler." James offered sarcastically. "I was in a hurry to keep the ship in a totally secure state!"
"Well!  It's good to know SOME people are doing their job right!" Vanessa raised an eyebrow at the now worried looking Drake Cliggs.
"Miss Chrysler, really, I don't have a clue who was in your underwear drawer!" Cliggs was starting to sweat as an angry Vanessa bore down on him. "The CCTV footage has gone astray and, and..."  He looked over at Torsky for help, but he had already left him to the mercy of the fuming nurse.

James Torsky was a short man at just five and a half feet tall.  He had high hopes upon entering the Jupiter Mining Corporation, but was soon shifted over to serve on the newly commissioned Blue Dwarf, who's sole mission was to find and bring back it's missing sister ship, Red Dwarf.  Torsky was signed to the security department rather quickly and placed on duty on Q deck, one of the most desolate and unused decks on board, where it would seem he was forgotten about completely, just like everyone else that worked down there.
He had only taken a few steps down the corridor when his intercom bleeped.  It was Reggie Shayne.
"Alright Reggie?! What's the good word?" There was a bleep and a bit of static.
"Just on my rounds. Cliggs came down hard on me when he caught me playing chess with the skutters while on duty."
"Tough break mate. I just left Nurse Chrysler kicking his arse over something to do with her knickers." Torsky heard a chuckle over the intercom. "Dirty old fart probably wears them when he's alone at night!"
He heard Reggie laugh harder as he turned a corner in the corridor. Being so used to walking the same round every night at the same time he almost walked straight past the device attached to the wall. He had a quick look at it and buzzed over the intercom again.

"Reg, I'm stood outside the life support backup room and theres something attached to the wall here." He looked closely at it and put his ear against it. "It's not making any noise or doing anything spectacular, just a little green flashing light every second or so."

"Oh, yeah. I heard they were running some tests on the hardware down there next week. Must be getting started early."

Torsky straightened up and shrugged. 

"Nothing suspicious to report then." He said as he carried on down the corridor. "Fancy getting the boys together for a game of zero-gee?"
"Shrub! You read my mind!" Reggie couldn't remember why he was called Shrub either.  The truth was, it was actually Jay Chrysler, now the captain of the ship, that gave him the name.  Finding him one night, curled up in one of the many artificial bushes on the promenade after a particularly heavy session in Parrott's Bar. That was nearly seven years ago, and not even the captain could remember it (He was rather drunk himself at the time).
"See you down there in ten." As Torsky switched off his intercom  he was thrown fifteen feet through the air as a large blast shook the walls and floor around him.
"SMEG!" He scrambled to his feet as a fresh gash on his forehead started to bleed down his face.  Running back the way he came, he drew his pistol. 
Turning the corner he knew that the life support test had either gone really wrong, or that was a bomb.  His intercom screamed into life with numerous voices.
"Torsky?! What the hell was that?!" Cliggs screamed from the comms unit.
"Shrub?" Reggie this time.
"Who the hell is Shrub?!" Cliggs was still screaming frantically..
"Who the smeg is shouting at me?!" Reggie sounded confused. "I'm scared enough as it is.  I just farted and it felt like the whole ship was torn in half!"
"Shayne? Is that you?!" Cliggs sounded more pissed off than ever now.
"Will you two clowns shut up and tell me what's going on?" It was the Captain was heard this time. Reggie and Cliggs seemed to wait for the answer. Torsky spoke up first.

"Life support is damaged sir. I don't know to what extent, you need to ask one of your engineers. I do know one thing for sure though."
"What is it... err... Who are you?" The Captain realised he hadn't a clue who he was speaking to.

"James Torsky sir. Security guard, Q deck." He found it hard to believe he was going to say this. "It was a bomb, sir. Somebody wanted to take out the life support systems for the entire ship."
Just then the tannoys throughout the ship blared into life and a heavily German accented voice poured out.
"This is an important announcement. Life support systems have been critically damaged. Only thirty eight hours use remain. But not to worry, Captain Chrysler. In just thirteen hours a total of nine strategically placed explosives will rip through the circumference of your hull. Needless to say captain, your life support systems will be rather redundant when you and your crew are floating around in space. Let this be a warning to the Jupiter Mining Corps. that although we may not be a huge competition in business, the International German-only Mining Division is not one to be overlooked. My men have already disabled your precious fleet of craft. That stupid blue alien was easily paid off. End transmission. Ha! We showed them! Pull your pants up man, we are meant to be professionals. What do you mean it's still switched on? Oh son of a bit...."
The transmission was cut off and throughout the ship there was silence. Torsky leant up against the wall in shock, not realising he was leaning on the keypad of the airlock behind him.
"Connection disengaged." Came the small female voice of the airlock control.  Torsky spun round in time to see a small craft floating away from the airlock. Not knowing how much trouble he was in already he decided not to tell anyone about it and instead headed on down the corridor to the security office.

When he arrived Jay Chrysler was already there, marching around and rubbing his head furiously.  Almost panicked he spun to the newly arrived Torsky and grabbed and shook his hand.
"Jay Chrysler, nice to meet you."
"We met before. When I first arrived. You were pretty much just another peon back then, but it's good to see you've worked your way to the top. Must be daunting! I bet the pressure is difficult to cope with..." Torsky trailed off.
"Rambling Torsky?" James nodded at the Captain. "Don't worry about it. This is some pretty heavy stuff you've landed in." He paused again with his finger on his chin, thinking hard about something. "Did I hear someone call you Shrub?"
"Yeah." Torsky nodded some more. He made a mental note to stop it. "The guys have called me that for years. What exactly is going on here Captain?"
"I really don't know. Why don't you tell me what happened." Chrysler got comfy in Cliggs' chair as Torsky started telling his short and rather useless story.

"Where is our boarding craft?" Demanded Zvelter. "I told you to remember where you parked! Now we're lost!"
"But it was right here!" Zvelters right hand man looked like he was about to break into a cold sweat. "Someone must have disengaged the connection!"
"So you are telling me that our only way of escaping this huge blue ticking bomb is now floating out in space?" The German terrorist leader started to turn a deep shade of angry red. "The only reason I'm not going to kill you right now is because you are the only one who knows how to re-mobilise the craft in the hangar to get us out of here!"

"So you're telling me they are still on-board? That must have been their boarding craft!" He stood up, slapping the table with his hand. "Get yourselves saddled up boys! There's going to be some pretty pissed off terrorists on board." He pressed the intercom button on Cliggs desk. "Jayne, get together anybody you can, the guys that are trying to blow us up will be heading to the flight deck. They are in need of a ride, and we're not going to give them one!" He turned back to the two security guards with a confused look on his face. "Are you two idiots? GO!"
With that James Torsky and Lt. Cliggs turned and ran straight to the armoury where Reggie was already waiting, armed to the teeth and looking like action man.
"Let's kick ass and chew bubblegum!" He said with copious amounts of joy, obviously looking forward to seeing some action. "It's about time we got to shoot things up! I didn't go to Security College to walk around an empty deck all day long!"
"I don't want you running in guns blazing Shayne." Lt Cliggs warned Reggie. "Let's use some professionalism for once!"
Reggie saluted Cliggs.
"Yes, sir!"

• Continue to "Zerstoren" Part 2

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