Quotes

This is a selection of our best quotes from across the years, contributed by different writers. If you have a suggestion for a quote to go here please contact us.

	Andy Roos Amber embodied everything about the female race that both confused and, to be honest, frightened him. -Andy Roos (read full post) More...
	Seymour knighthood "Seymour has a train set! Seymour has a train set!!" Emma mocked, others started chanting too. "Stop it, I'm a Royal Ambassador… RIGHT THAT'S IT, NO KNIGHTHOOD FOR ANY OF YOU LOT! I can send a blacklist to the royal family you know!" -Seymour, ... More...
	Eddie Monsoon, crap on Seymour "Good Morning Sir" answered the toilet in a posh, cultured tone. Like many other people aboard the ship, he had changed the toilet's default voice from a gruff, guttural voice to one that was based on Seymour Niples, the ship's ambassador, ... More...
	Shit in Docs boots "Ok Amber, You ready to rock?" "Does Mini-Phil shit in the Doc's boots?" "That a yes?" "Yeah.." "Disgusting....but funny! Let's burn outta here!" -Jay aka Andy Longman (Read full post) More...
	Burn the tape "Look," said Dr Keto slowly, "I suggest that we either walk away now and pretend this whole sordid mess never happened...or find that tape, check what DID happen, burn it, and then walk away and pretend this whole sordid mess never happened." -Dr ... More...
	Satan skates to work "Fun!? FUN!? The day I have fun with you, Mr Chrysler, is the day that Satan skates to work, has a snowball fight with his minions, loses and then spends the rest of his days making snow angels in his back garden, now GET OFF ME!" -quote by Dr ... More...
	MP's laundry basket "It smell's worse than Mini-Phils laundry basket...." "Don't exaggerate..." Said Jay. "Compared to the little perverts crusty gusset, this is fragrant!" quote by Jay (read full post) More...
	Hymenoptera moon As if on que, the Hymanoptera ship spun around so the pair could see Jay quite clearly flipping them off through the window, and although usually without clothes, the hymanoptera were clearly mooning them, after which the ship spun around again ... More...
	Who's Dean? "Who's Dean?" Guinevere asked. "Dean Thomas. You name it, he can crash it." McJohn said. -quote by Eric Lustbader (read full post) More...
	Tie shoelaces ...the mere fact that you can tie your shoe laces makes you more qualified than Efof, and the fact that you clearly know that Starbug's are supposed to FLY as opposed to plummet instantly makes you a better pilot than Mr. Thomas here... No ... More...
	Lost thrusters "WE'VE LOST THRUSTERS!" Jay announced.."I've lost control of the shuttle....were gonna crash..EVERYBODY TO THE BACK! NOW!... except you Keto come sit on the dashboard..." -quote by Jay (read full post) ... More...
	Chinese restaurant "Holly?" "Yes dude?" "Where's Jay gone?" "Jay... Jay who?" "Jay the chinese restaurant owner... who do you think?" "He's in the chinese restaurant" "Chrysler's in a chinese restaurant?" "No... Jay the Chinese Restaurant owner's in the chinese ... More...
	Zombie head Seymour whined and almost cried. And when he managed to stand upright he realised he still had a soft zombie head attached to this hand, his thumb picking it up like a bowling ball. Seymour took one look at it and vomited onto it. He shook the ... More...
	Shipwide disaster "You're serious?" asked Rosette skeptically, "That's the problem?" "One screw caused a ship-wide disaster?" blinked Wildflower. "Technically, creature, one screw caused YOU. I count that as a ship-wide disaster," said Keto bluntly. Then he ... More...