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Meeting room

The meeting room is adjacent to the Drive Room, and is where crew members discuss missions or plans of action. Meetings are normally lead by the Captain, who invites the Department Heads, and any other crewmember who is believed will either contribute to the meeting, or will need to hear what is being discussed.

If an away team is going on a dangerous mission, they will normally plan it out in this room before they go.

The meeting room had a large table with plenty of seats for everybody, and has a large computer screen that can display information or imagery for the meeting. The table also has a state-of-the-art holographic projector so that it can display holograms of planets, spacestations, areas of space or spaceships, to allow it easier to discuss the details of the mission. Unfortunately this is rarely used as nobody really knows how to use it. Monitors embedded into the table are also useful for showing maps of terrain, or star charts, to easily plan out routes or battle tactics.

The chairs in the Meeting Room are deliberately not comfortable, otherwise crewmembers might find it easy to fall asleep.

Fun things to do in a meeting:

• Check your watch very regularly, every 30 seconds or so.
• Laugh uproariously at a quip that was made 2 or 3 minutes ago. Say, "Oh, now I get it!"
• Stand up and act indignant. Demand that the boss tell you the real reason this meeting has been called.
• Slowly slump in your seat. When you are about to fall off the chair, suddenly straighten up. Apologize profusely.
• Complain loudly that your neighbour won't stop touching you. Demand that the Captain make him/her stop doing it.
• Bring a huge jar of Vaseline to the meeting. Display it prominently.
• Stay behind as everyone else, including the Captain, leaves. Thank them for coming.
• Every so often, duck under the table. Stare in horror. Pop back up and look real scared.
• Distribute free condoms before or after the meeting.
• Bring a pitcher of non-alcoholic beer to the meeting. As the meeting progresses, start slurring your speech. Belch loudly. Tell your co-workers you can't help it. Start crying.
• Bring a doughnut cushion and use it. If anybody asks, say that your haemorrhoids are really acting up this week. Offer to share it if they really need it. Be embarrassingly persistent in your offer. Offer to show them how bad they are.